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Look Up! Carice Finds a Way to Empowerment After the Abuse

I feel empowered because I don’t need someone else to make me feel like I’m okay. I am okay with me and who I am.

 

Carice Bulloch was in an abusive relationship and had three kids when she went through a difficult divorce. “My divorce was terrible, it was awful. And I was pretty beat down, pretty verbally abused, you know. I didn’t realize a lot of things.” After the divorce, Carice found herself raising her three children alone on a teacher’s salary. She moved forward as a single parent with her head down, focused on her work and kids, but she wasn’t so focused on what she needed.

Her kids are grown now and over the past couple of years, Carice “really found a way to feel empowered” when an amazing counselor suggested that she start a gratitude journal. “I tell my students today, that journal absolutely changed my life.” Carice began to think differently. Rather than having a victim mentality, she began to notice what she was grateful for. “It was awful things that happened, you know, and you have every right to be a victim and justified in it, but it’s not where you want to be.”

Then one day as she began noticing what she was grateful for, she was driving home from work and a voice came to her mind that said, “pull over and look up.” When she did, she saw the most amazing bald eagle. She shared the experience with a Native American friend who told her, “In our culture, to see a bald eagle like that is very meaningful. You need to search inside yourself to know what that meaning is.” 

Carice came to understand the meaning was to “look up” in many aspects of her life. “I realized that it is time for me to stop plowing forward with my head down. I needed to look up and work through some issues with my kids. I needed to look up and see the beautiful things around me.” As she began doing that, Carice started taking pictures of the beautiful things around her. “I began taking beautiful pictures of hot air balloons rising in the morning, beautiful pictures of hawks and eagles. Beautiful pictures of sunsets.” As she began to look up and notice the beauty around her, she was able to give back to others. “Now that I’ve taken care of myself, and my own spirit, I can be there for my kids. That’s what this life is all about.”  

What made Carice feel empowered was to realize, “It’s okay to feed your spirit and take some time for yourself. I feel empowered because I don’t need someone else to make me feel like I’m okay. I am okay with me and who I am. And it’s okay to take care of me, it’s okay.” Carice hopes to inspire other women to, “Find time to look up, find things to be grateful for, find some time in your day to get out of your head. Take some time for you. That’s what I would tell women. You’re important, you know. That’s what I would tell them. You’re important.”

Noticing the beauty around her is grounding, and that applies to makeup as well. “It’s anytime you can do anything natural. Nature is beautiful, nature is what grounds us.” Carice would advise anyone on the fence about using natural cosmetics to, “just get a couple of things, try it out and see how it works for you.”  To her, it is about noticing how Lauren Brooke products feel on her body. “It feels lighter and it feels grounding. The Botanical Lip Gloss smells fabulous. That’s part of grounding too, noticing the way things smell, noticing the way that they feel.”

For decades, Carice would resist it when others would tell her to wear a little more makeup. But she’s started to try new things and notice how it feels. “I’ve started wearing a little more makeup and I like it! You know, I like it. I always thought I’d go naturally grey, but I’m not ready, so I started dying my hair.” Just doing some of those things for herself is important to Carice. “It’s not so heavy, not so much about head down work. It gives you some confidence; some playful, creative fun.”

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